Dear Passengers

Alright, rookie! So you've signed up for the adventure of a lifetime with our... unique airline. Don't worry, it's not *that* dangerous. Probably.

1. First, get everyone in their assigned seats. Try not to let the passengers see the duct tape holding the fuselage together.

2. Now, the crucial part. starting the engines. It might take a few tries, and a bit of percussive maintenance.

3. Once airborne, one of you needs to manage the controls. The other should grab tools to fix the inevitable sparks and leaks.

4. Keep an eye on the cargo bay. If those crates start moving, it's your cue to panic and maybe jettison them.

5. Landing? Well, that's more of a suggestion. Aim for anything flat-ish and hope for the best. Passengers might be strapped in, or they might not.

6. Celebrate surviving! Or, you know, debrief on what went wrong. It's usually everything. Good luck, you'll need it!

Remember, the only true failure is not having a laugh while everything falls apart. See you on the next chaotic flight!